We create a fake job.
Just give me one second.
Two minutes, thank you.
Hi, good afternoon. Sorry about that.
And posted it online and in newspapers.
Then we held real interviews.
Hi, nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you as well.
Have you ever done one of these interviews over the camera before? No!
Let me tell you a little bit about the job to get started with.
It's not just a job. It's sort of probably the most important job. The title that we have going right now is Director of Operations, but it's really kind of so much more than that. Responsibilities and requirements are really quite extensive.
First category for the requirements would be mobility. This job requires that you must be able to work standing up most or really all of the time-constantly on your feet, constantly bending over, constantly exerting yourself a high level of stamina.
That's a lot.
For how many, like, for how many hours?
A hundred and thirty five hours to unlimited hours a week, it's basically twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week.
I'm sure you'll have a chance from time to time to maybe just sit down here and there, yeah?
You mean like a break? Yeah.
No, there are no breaks available.
Is that even legal?
Of course, yeah.
So like, no lunch?
You can have lunch, but only when the associate is done eating their lunch.
I think that's a little intense.
No, that's crazy.
Now this position requires excellent negotiation and interpersonal skill. We're really looking for someone that might have a degree in medicine, in finance and the culinary arts. You must be able to wear several hats.
The associate needs constant attention. Sometimes they have to stay up with an associate throughout the night. You need to be able to work in a chaotic environment. If you had a life, we'd ask you to sort of give that life up. No vacations. In fact, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Years and holidays, the workload is gonna go up. And we demand that with a happy disposition.
That's almost cruel. That's almost a very very sick, twisted joke.
But when is the time to sleep or...
Oh, no time to sleep.
Yeah, all encompassing almost.
That's exactly right.
Three hundred and sixty five days a year? Yeah. No! That's inhumane.
That's very insane.
The meaningful connections that you make, and the feeling that you get for helping your associate are immeasurable. Also, let's cover the salary. The position is gonna pay absolutely nothing.
Nobody will do that for free. It's crazy! Yeah, pro bono. Completely for free. No!
What if I told you that there's someone that, actually, currently holds this position right now?
Billions of people actually. Who? Moms.
That's awesome. Yeah!
And they meet every requirement, don't they?
Oh, my God! Moms are the best.
Yes, no pay, they're 24 hours, they're always there.
Now I'm thinking about my mom.
Yeah, and what are you thinking about her?
I'm thinking about all those nights and everything.
Thank you so much for everything you do. I know it doesn't seem like I appreciate all of it but I definitely do.
So, mom, I wanna say thank you for everything that you've done. I love you very much. You've been there through thick and thin. My mom is just awesome. She is awesome.
This Mother's Day, you might want to make her a card.